what i'm looking for

I'm a bit tipsy right now, so you'll have to pardon any misspellings. But I've found I'm more blunt and honest when slightly inebriated, so bear with me.

Since I've received quite a lot of cynical remarks from people mostly guys that I'm being too picky or careful whenever relationship topic was arisen in few conversations. Heck, it's not that I choose to be a spinster or will reject any kind of affection, it's just that I AM not ready since I broke up few months ago. I don't want to hurt anybody with my philophobic self for now.

But if what i'm looking for in a guy can be listed, this would be mine. So here it is:

Intelligence -
In the same vein, I can’t see myself ever dating someone who didn’t have some innate curiosity that propelled them towards always learning and being open to the things around them. Accordingly, an inherent ability to use one’s own sound judgment to decipher the world around them is a necessity. I want you to be varied and brilliant. I want to learn as much as I want to teach. I feel the best relationships have a sort of symbiosis to them when it comes to intellectual interaction. Basically just be a some sort of a nerd. Read books. Be interested in the world around you and realize you are Not center of the universe.

Religious -
Ok I'm not going to say everybody who have sinned will go to hell. It's not us to judge and make the final decision. Just remember, how and why we've existed in this world. How we stay grounded and be hopeful of tomorrow? To have good intentions not only for yourself. Please just be faithful to God. By then perhaps after that, when He permits, we could actually be together?

Passion and Ambition -
Love what you do. It doesn't have to make you rich. I've never relied on a man for money and I don't intend to. But you must really have a passion for what you're doing. Have motivation. Constantly strive to do better, to keep creating, to want to share some part of yourself with the world in some way. That being said, please also be able to support yourself. I'm not going to be there forever whenever you need me.

Compassion and understanding -
i'm an analytical creature, yes, but most of this is born of a love for people. Being analytical allows me to detach and try to understand where people are coming from. Having this understanding makes me hate you less.

Honesty and Being Open -
just tell me how you're feeling or what you're pissed off about. be self aware. this doesn't, by any means, mean you know how to fix it if it's broken.

Sexuality -
yes i'm an old fashion lady when it comes to this part. i'm saving myself for my husband once i'm married. so imagine how nervous and excited i am if the day comes. so i hope, if you were to be an ice cream, please don't be vanilla. i like it varied and different and want to try new things. i'm sure, i'll favour all the love making just as much as you do, if not more.

Optimism -
should be dosed with healthy amounts of cynicism. a recognition that life is not always apple pie and sparklers and happy times. sadness, depression, anger, all of these things are a natural part of life and should never be stifled, but a hopefulness for a better tomorrow is necessary.

Sense of humor -
again, a dose of cynicism will do wonders. acerbic, astringent, witty, dry and biting, all of these are words i find endearing.

Romance -
have an understanding of what it means to be sweet and thoughtful. know that when you really care for someone, taking their feelings into consideration should happen naturally and should be instrinsic. this does not mean that you discount your own feelings. it means that someone else is important to you.

Gender roles -
understand these are entirely fluid and should never totally remain within archaic constraints. i may be an aggressive female, but i still love with when a man get all protective.

Appearance -
i can honestly say i generally go for darker features. But really, just be my height or taller. everything else is subject to chemistry (mostly built on the above).

but as always, at the end of the end when i love somebody, it's because i fell for something totally unexpected. God knows best. hehe well just have a big faith and beautiful heart. i will totally dig you.